These days, a mobile phone is a deeply personal item. I carry mine with me everywhere I go. It is part of my identity. True, as a superficial object it can never be a source of true happiness. But let's face it, it's nice to have a good phone. I've had four phones in my life, and the best one was a miniature Panasonic GD51 GD55 I got at some sketchy shop in the West Village that imports phones from Asia. Friends called it my Zoolander phone. Regrettably, it was stolen by some theiving punks. Now I use a Motorola PEBL, which is bad at everything it does and has an interface so bewildering it must have been designed either by idiots or rocket scientists. When I'm in a bad mood, my cell phone makes me feel worse.

My two-year contract with T-Mobile is up, so I can get a new phone at a steep discount from any service provider. The array of choices has left me bewildered. Here are my conditions:

• First, since I travel, I want a quad-band world phone. I think that rules out every provider except T-Mobile and AT&T.
• Second, no smart phone. I refuse to pay for a data plan. Sorry Apple, sorry Blackberry.
• Third, I swear to you I will never buy another Motorola product as long as I walk this Earth.
• Fourth, I like small, light phones that look sharp and are easy to use. I don't really give a care about a camera or a music player.
• Fifth, I'm not gonna pay a lot for this muffler. That means the phone should be free or in the neighborhood of $50.

Right now I'm eyeing the Samsung Blast, but at this point in the buying process, I am highly succeptable susceptible to persuasion. Any suggestions?

Drop T-Mobile. You may be able to call internationally with Verizon, though I've never tried it. Buy a phone that flips closed or somehow covers the keypad (mine keeps dialing people from my pocket, even with keylock on!) Avoid touch screens made by anyone other than Apple. I'm pleased with my LG EnV2, but like any phone that does too many things it is hard to navigate the labyrinthine menus. Go to a store and play around with the phones before you decide on one. And stop whining.

Jess is right. Succeptable is not a word.

I am pleased with my enV2 as well, as much as I hate the stylized name of the thing. It has, however, made calls from my pocket and from my purse, despite its flip-open capabilities.

I have used Verizon international and the rate structure is confusing, but if you are billing it to work, who cares? And if you are anywhere for a long period of time and run into a problem, many foreign countries let you do short term phone rentals. We had one in South Africa and that was years before the U.S. had tracfones.