Why will it be a hit? Because it’s about Twitter. Certainly not because it’s a good story. (I mean, it’s not awful.) As soon as you write about Twitter, people on Twitter forward the story around, and you’ve instantly got a substantial audience. It’s lightning fast, instant attention. Highly rewarding, highly addictive.

There’s a strong temptation to write about Twitter every day, because readers like it, it’s easy traffic and it actually feels important. It’s a trap! The medium is not the message. As is the case in Iran, what’s important is what people are saying, not what medium they’re choosing to say it in.

Previous posts about Twitter:
Twitter kills Patrick Swayze. Will it kill again?
URGENT! Don’t ask why, just panic!

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

If I came back with 30 friends and staged a protest inside the Sears, would we be arrested? Probably.

Why, then, should Amazon.com listen to customers who whine about the high cost of books for the Kindle? The individual customer doesn’t set the price, the market does.

You might think the Internet is breeding this great new wave of consumer rights, where customers have a dialogue with companies, and everyone is better for it. The problem is the feedback loops on the Internet tend to ignore complex problems, and amplify simple whining.

Facebook keeps making changes in response to customer complains from mass mobs of customers who barely know what they’re talking about. And Facebook is a free service—a gift! When all you have to do is click “yes” to protest something, it’s easy to transform a bunch of ambivalent users into a scary, angry mob a million strong. Flickr users figured out how absurd this is a few years ago, and set up jokey groups demanding that Flickr hand out free donuts.

Where is the example of an online mob identifying and solving a real problem? (Food safety and factory working conditions are real problems; the design of a juice carton or the tastefulness of some company’s advertising are not.) I can’t think of one.

The dialogues between customers and companies must get more sophisticated. Otherwise everybody is going to waste time fighting unwinnable battles.

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

Let’s break down this ad pitch: “Have you self-diagonsed yourself or your kids with a rare but scary disease? We can help get you cheap drugs from another country.”

I wonder what gets more clicks, this or Canadian Viagra?

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

Worst: Years ago, during my first-ever visit to New York City, my friends and I walked to Macy’s Herald Square, rode about 11 flights of escalators, and rode them back down. “The World’s Largest Store” functions adequately as a tourist attraction, but as a place to buy stuff, it’s a debacle. Its floorplan is chaotic, its pricing is erratic, and its salespeople are surly. Macy’s is constantly mailing me 25%-off coupons that seem like good deals, but have fine print so complicated you need the help of an accountant to understand all the exclusions. Twice now I’ve walked out of the store in mid-purchase because a coupon wouldn’t scan, and a sales-clerk blamed it on my failure to be functionally literate. (Am I the first person to think “Menswear” means “men’s clothes”?) And no, I don’t want to save ten percent with a Macy’s card! Macy’s? Over! Happily, in this city I have lots of other options.

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

“Without consulting us, the DVD company (not WB/Nonesuch) that released “I am trying to break your heart” is about to issue a Blu-Ray Edition which, no surprise, costs considerably more (nearly 2x) than the standard DVD. We’re unsure as to the rationale for the release, given that the film was shot in beautiful grainy B&W and has a stereo-only audio track… there is, in our opinion, not much to be gained by spending the extra cash. It’s your money… and in this case you should probably hang onto it.”

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

For the same reason, I don’t have cable. Mike also doesn’t have cable. He observed that the the only reason the two of us can survive without cable is that we don’t care about sports.

He’s right – If I were a sports fan, I wouldn’t futz around. Of course I’d pony up for all the digital ESPN channels. But that’s not all. I’d need a flat-panel big screen, surround sound speakers, a couple of foam fingers, jerseys, jackets, decals, a custom license plate frame, a wind sock, a flag, a life-size cardboard cutout of the coach, massive amounts of Doritos and Yuengling, a salsa dish that plays the fight song, season tickets, and a class A Winnebago with painted in the team colors. Let’s go $tate!

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

So this is what they’ve been doing with our 401(k) money. Raise your hand if you regret ticking the “moderately aggressive” box.

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

Subject: We have hijacked your baby

From: “cornellis xinghao”
Date: Wed, August 27, 2008 5:06 am
To: daryl@daryllang.com

Hey We have hijacked your baby but you must pay once to us $50 000. The details we will send later…

We has attached photo of your fume

Attachment: photo.zip

Let’s break this down. First, I have no baby. Second, hijacked? Could “baby” refer to a vehicle, as in, “Let’s get this baby in the air!” or “Let’s go captain, we’re sailing this baby to Panama!”? Third, there’s that intriguing use of the word fume. Can you take a photo of something that is, by definition, a vapor?

Until I solve this riddle, guess what attachment I’m not opening?

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.

“Beer prices at bars and restaurants have risen over the past few months, as prices of hops and barley have skyrocketed and retail business has slowed alongside the economy.

“Some restaurants have replaced 16-ounce pint glasses with 14 ouncers — a type of glassware one bartender called a ‘falsie.’

“And customers are complaining that bartenders are increasingly putting less than 16 ounces of beer in a pint glass, filling up the extra space with foam.”

To me, the most surprising part of this story is the outrage from beer fans the reporter quoted. Some people will actually send back a beer if they don’t think they got enough in the glass. I find the idea of getting ripped off to be, well, part of what a bar is all about. Why do we pack into some crowded dive to pay $5 for a bottle of Amstel Light, then tip even the most inattentive bartender 20 percent for uncapping it? I dunno. Because that’s the social order of things?

This post first appeared on the History Eraser Button blog.